So nearly a year ago Daddy and I were talking and the conversation got around to shaving down "there". Now I am an older woman (my two sons could be my grandchildren) and I am uber curvy to boot so I had never dared to shave my kitty. Of course Daddy being Daddy he insisted. I shave my legs like twice a year. I only have 3 or 4 hairs near my ankles on each side. So I had to go out and get good razors and shave cream and moisturizer.
I carry all my weight in my tummy so I have to shave blind. I do it all by feel. to make it worse, I think my arms are shorter than average because I can only reach with one arm at a time. It wasn't fun nor pretty. I cut myself in a few places then in bed that night I was feeling my hairless puss and discovered it wasn't as hairless as I had thought.
Over the months I've gotten better but could still never get it all and it grows back so fast. I would love to get it waxed but like I can afford that? Not. Lucky for me I was on Fetlife and they were talking about waxing and someone mentioned sugaring. I Googled it...what else? I found a lot of Youtubes showing how it is done and how to make your own. Bingo!
So today I tried it. Mixed sugar, water, salt, and lemon juice and cooked it. Did what it showed on the video. Poured it out and cooled it. Hmmm still the consistency of molasses. Put what I could back in the pan and then cooked it some more. Poured and cooled again. Oh now we are getting somewhere!
Got it into a ball and started to work it, keeping my hands wet. It got softer and softer and softer until it slid right through my fingers. Sighs again. Poured the whole thing down the sink.
By now the kitchen was starting to get a bit sticky everywhere but thoughts of a smooth hairless kitty kept tempting me so I gave it one more go. Used a little less water and lemon juice this time. Poured it into the pan and let it sit for a bit. Started scooping it into a ball. Secret to keeping your hands wet...just wet the tips of your fingers and rub that over your hand. Work it good and keep transferring it hand to hand because it is still HOT!
Put it into a small bowl and took it to my desk. Tried it on my underarms and then face. Took some of the hair off. I had to play a while to figure out the right consistency. I had put some in a small dish like they use for soy sauce when you eat sushi. When it got cold I would microwave it for 10 seconds to soften it up again. I finally got the hang of it and was happily reclined on my bed slapping carmelized sugar on my privates. It wasn't too painful and i was impressed that the hair was coming off. The trips back and forth to the microwave got tedious though.
After a while I decided I wanted to throw away the part I was using and get a new piece so I stuck the bigger bowl in the microwave and put it on the same 10 seconds. Took it out and gingerly touched it and DAMN! Put my index finger right into liquid molten sugar! I stuck my finger under cold water then on a chunk of ice in the freezer. It hurt like hell for like 2 minutes, then it stopped. Not a good sign. I went back to finishing my wax job. When I was done I was mostly hairless, sticky from head to toe and had a huge blister on my right index finger, the finger I use the most.
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| My finger..that is a blister! |
It did start to hurt later around the edges but not on the burn itself. I did get to whine to Daddy who was properly saddened by the fact I was hurt. I am also learning to type with only 9 fingers.
On a funnier note, my son came home from school and seeing the bowl on my desk asked what it was. I told him sugaring wax to take the hair off like my eyebrows. He asked what was in it and when I told him he said, "Does it taste good and can I have it for snack?"
So that is my sad story for the day. I will try this sugaring thing again and see how it goes next time.
Smoochie is ready to snuggle with me so good night!
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